Ramblings of My Mind

ellipsis_addict @ 2009-10-16T16:00:00

2009-10-16T20:32:00Z

Most of this post is basically an It Just Bugs Me.

I know I haven't posted here in, well, ages, but there's just something that's been bugging me about fanfiction:

The insistence in some Harry Potter fanfics that purebloods are all aristocrats. Or, at least, that the "good" ones are. And by this I mean the Malfoys and the Blacks, not the Weasleys.

In the Dangerverse series*, they went through this whole thing where Sirius "returned to his roots" or something of the sort, and there was an implication that this was part of a Season.

I don't mind the idea, in general. It just bugs me that there is no evidence that any of these people were anything but Slytherins. "Why are only Slytherins allowed to be snobs?" is I guess what I'm really asking, although there was a Ravenclaw character involved in the above mentioned plotline.

But that's just a small part.

In both the Dangerverse and another AU series I'm reading, The Sacrifices Arc**, purebloods have a lot of weird traditions. Okay, fine, they probably do have some. Like signing their names in blood on their wedding contracts. Or swearing by blood that nothing bad would happen to a visitor to their home. Or, you know, not. There's no evidence of it.

I think my major problem is the idea that all Slytherin purebloods are elitist, snobbish aristocrats, and their looking down on everyone else makes sense since they are better than them.

And, specifically about the Sacrifices Arc, I don't find the idea that Harry used the term "mudblood" casually a sign that he potentially has good breeding.

*Of course there are other things that bug me about the Dangerverse series, not the least of the way that one of the characters covered the Sorting Hat's mouth in order to stop herself from being sent to Slytherin. Or the author's constantly having people turn into animals, and not just within HP.

**Again there are other things bugging me about the Sacrifices Arc. Mostly the way that they have a Boy-Who-Lived without Lily being dead. *** But I'm still on the first story, so maybe there's an explanation for that.

***I wonder if anyone has written anything where James managed to survive October 31, 1981 (by not being home that night, perhaps).

ellipsis_addict @ 2008-01-18T13:28:00

2008-01-18T18:37:19Z

I know it's been a few weeks, but mostly because it seems like as soon as I make an update, something worse happens.

Shortly after I announced that things with my father were going better, he took a massive turn for the worst and was touch and go there for a bit. He was put on a respirator vent and last week they had to put a trach in along with a feeding tube that is supposed to be temporary. (They are supposed to be seeing how well he can swallow before removing it, but I haven't been told if they've made any attempt as of yet.) He was sent to the hospital with pneumonia and ended up developing Guillian-Barre. (Me, being a dork, upon hearing that he has Guillian-Barre went "That's a House disease." Every movement that he had on his left side is virtually gone now, though the treatments seem to be working and he's slowly making some improvements. They also managed to get him off the vent for a bit, but a couple of days ago his lungs got bad again and they had to go in there and clean them out.

I'm also having trouble getting on the internet anywhere else but at work because I'm a moron. We were doing some remodeling at home, and in the process our cable modem went missing. So I went out to buy a new one and set it all up. Kept all the paperwork and everything. Threw out the box. (First step of my being a moron.)

Several days go by and I can't get it connect correctly. Finally I call the cable company and go through everything. At some point, the guy comes on the phone and says "I'm sorry, this modem isn't compatible with [cable company]." He then lists off a whole bunch that are. (Second part of my being a moron... waiting for a week or so to call)

So now I'm out the cost of the new cable modem and have a useless one. And now I've got to go buy another one.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-12-17T23:43:00

2007-12-18T04:47:23Z

Just a couple of updates.

First of all: My father's doing really well. He went from barely being able to move, and unable to speak, to, well, being able to move and speaking a bit. In a week. They did realize that it was, in fact, a stroke, but he's doing a lot better. He even told my mother not to worry and that he'd be home soon. (Not exactly, but close enough I think)

About my AU, with everything that's happened, I've pretty much abandoned it, at least the way it was. I'm still thinking about doing some things in the same sort of universe, and I do have a few ideas, but I need to do some planning. I hope no one was holding their breath for an update. :)

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-12-08T09:53:00

2007-12-08T14:55:25Z

They just took my father to the hospital with a possible stroke. Just so you know.

EDIT: They're not sure it's a stroke. They're really not sure what's wrong, I think.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-12-06T13:49:00

2007-12-06T18:58:59Z

I did something really, ridiculously stupid on Neopets last night. No, really. Incredibly stupid.

All right, for a few days I'd had a trade up for a Deluxe Popstar in a Box. I didn't give a price that I wanted for it since I'd seen a huge, crazy range and I didn't know how much it cost. Last night, someone contacts me and wants to know. I had no idea, but the lowest price on there was 1.8 million (at that time). I suggested 1.5 million.

The girl waffled a bit and told me about some shells she had up. I checked the shells... the next highest price up there was 900K. She wanted 800K. At this point, I figured "Whatever" and agreed. She got my DPiaB, I got her shell (less than what I'd asked but I was tired of the darned thing anyway).

Here's my stupid mistake. I put the shell up for auction. I never do auctions, and so I screwed up. I put a starting bid at 5K with increments of 1NP.

*headdesks* The shell ended up being sold for 16K. But that was still completely idiotic of me.

I'm trying not to worry about it, but I'm kicking myself since I lost more than 1 million NPs in the long run.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-12-05T21:13:00

2007-12-06T02:14:06Z

Just in case you were wondering why the rest of Chapter Four was taking so long, it's still slowly coming together. Hopefully, I'll be able to do a couple more updates in a day or so, though.

Part of my problem was considering the faculty list in this Alternate Universe. It was a bit difficult. :)

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-29T20:56:00

2007-11-30T01:58:51Z

Chapter Four: September 1, 1971

It was shortly after midnight when the group met in the Forest of Dean. They cast as many protection spells as they could, and if any member of their group couldn’t find them so be it. Their group membership shifted weekly as it was, and it was too dangerous to use one place for long. It was said that Grindelwald had methods of discovering secrets; but the truth was that Tom Riddle had the methods, Grindelwald just used them.

“I don’t trust him,” one of them men said, in an undertone.

“Neither do I, but he’s the best chance we’ve got.”

“He’ll betray us first chance he has,” the first man said, loudly, and several winced

A red-haired man wearily wiped his glasses on a rag. “You’re probably right, Alastor. But what other choice do we have?”

“Plenty, Septimus. We could not help Grindelwald’s so-called ‘Undersecretary’ for starters. We’re walking right into a trap if we do.”

“That is why you’re here. You’re the best at sniffing out traps.”

“And I certainly smell something foul.”

Septimus sighed, and he put his hand to his head. He was getting too old for such foolishness. “Abe, he went to see you. What was your impression?”

“My impression was he’s a clever man. He knows how to get you to do what he wants. And he’s probably playing more than one angle at the same time.” Aberforth scratched his chin. “He’s after something.”

Septimus nodded. That had been the impression he’d had as well, based on the information from the others, and he was still frightened. But he knew they had to make a decision, and make it soon.

“If we do this, we’re bringing attention to ourselves,” Alastor said.

“And if we don’t, we’re risking everything… the world.” Septimus knew he wasn’t a forceful enough person to be in charge. He had just had it thrust upon him. “Do you want to see the world under Grindelwald’s control?”

“We’re risking enough as it is.”

Septimus didn’t see who said that, and their voice wasn’t familiar, but he glared in the general direction. “Damn it. Can’t you understand? We can talk about how much we hate Grindelwald, but until we do something about it, all it is… is just talk.”

“But why King’s Cross?” Alastor asked, and Septimus just shook his head. He didn’t know why, and the fact that the plan was for shortly before 10:00 am on the same morning that hundreds of children would be lining up to attend Hogwarts sent chills down his spine.

“We’ll – we’ll do it later than the planned time,” he said, and he felt like he was choking. “That way the children will be safe.”

“They’ll be at… Hogwarts.”

“Hogwarts is safer than in the middle of a full-blown war,” Septimus replied although he barely controlled a shudder. He knew what Hogwarts was like, his sons had told him, and he couldn’t believe the difference between then and when he was a boy. It was something out of his worst nightmares.

“That’s what we’re doing here, eh? Starting a war?”

Septimus met Alastor’s eyes, and he nodded once. He wished it didn’t have to be that way. But there were things worth dying for, and he figured freedom from tyranny was a good enough choice as any.

#

That morning, the children awoke to dark, rainy days. It suited Cassandra quite well, it fit her dreary mood. When she’d first accepted that she was a witch, and destined for Hogwarts, she never gave much thought to how far away the school was. Now, it fell heavily on her, and she could barely open her eyes long enough to pay attention to what day it was. It wasn’t until Lily had pounded on her head with Harry that she finally woke up.

The guests in their room, the Black sisters, had arrived the night before, and one of them had complained, quite loudly, about having to share a room with a group of Mudbloods. The youngest sister had turned a bit pink at her sister’s announcement, and the middle girl had become furious, which had turned into a physical fight with the two elder sisters nearly scratching each other’s eyes out. This, in turn, had caused Sirius to come running and offer to sleep in the room, allowing the other girls to share a room with his younger brother. Miss Kingston had overheard the declaration, and she ran to tell the Headmistress who forcibly pulled her son out of the room and sent the three Muggleborn girls down to the living room to sleep on the floor. Cassandra had learned enough about the incident to know that “Mudblood” was a rude term. Lily spent the rest of the night fuming about it.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-28T22:55:00

2007-11-29T04:42:29Z

A/N You know, I shouldn't have called Tommy "Mr. Riddle" at the end of the last chapter. Now I keep thinking of a Dora the Explorer episode where Boots goes "You can call me 'Mister RID-dles'" It's giving me a headache.

I'm tempted to avoid the whole Sorting Ceremony. They're long, boring and nothing that no one has ever seen before. Besides, I'm not sure what house I'm going to put her in. I'm torn between two choices...

All right, when we left off, Cassie got her wand and....:

Chapter Three Part Two

"Is this the one?" she asked, breathlessly, and he gave her a brief nod. She now knew why Sirius and her other friends had been that intent on going outside to play with the wand. When he handed her the box for it, she felt disappointed. She wanted to keep a hold onto it. It felt... right in her hands, and it was the only thing that she owned that she'd be allowed to keep.

That faint hint of hope she'd held, the hope that none of it was true and they would send her home, faded. Part of her wanted to find out what the wand was capable of, but the rest of her knew what she had to give up. She might not have liked being forced into this world, but she couldn't let it bring her down forever. She needed to try and accept it, and if getting the wand was a start, then that's what she would have to do.

She ran outside and joined Lily, who was trying to not look amused as Sirius made fun of the length of Peter's wand. Cassandra gave a half-hearted smile at the other girl, and they walked towards the bookshop together.

She might not like it, but she would have to learn to accept it.

#

At the Hog's Head, the lights were deceptively dim, and the place was seemingly empty. A lesser wizard might have assumed that they had shut down for the night, but he wasn't a lesser wizard. He'd watched the place for weeks, trying to determine a pattern, but he hadn't been able to. Clever, he'd thought, but not clever enough.

Tom Riddle unlocked the door to the pub, it was too easy, and he braced himself for a trap. He waited to see if the lights would turn on, but they didn't. Tom frowned. It was always possible Grindelwald had discovered his late-night excursions, but... no. If that had been the case, he wouldn't be standing there thinking about it. Grindelwald had a lot of faults, but he didn't fool around when he sensed treachery.

"Homenum revelio," Tom muttered, and he waited as the spell told him there was someone in the building. "Lumos." He lit the walls and floor of the pub, searching for anything unusual. Then he saw it. The lit square of a secret passageway into the cellar.

As silently as he could muster, he crept across the room, and he rapped on the door in the floor with his foot. When he received no answer, he pointed his wand at the door.

"Bombarda", he said, and the door blasted open. (1)

A man climbed up a moment later, pieces of the door stuck in his beard, and he blinked at Tom. "It's you. I should've guessed Albus was ready to turn me in."

"Is that so?" Tom raised his eyebrows in surprise. "I was under the impression he was quite fond of you."

"Whatever gave you that idea?"

Tom considered this for a moment. There was never any real indication that Dumbledore was fond of his siblings other than a feeling Tom occasionally had. Dumbledore never mentioned the rest of his family, in fact few seemed to be aware they existed, but Tom's feelings were rarely wrong. Theoretically, Dumbledore's siblings could be used as leverage, but if Tom attempted anything this early in the game, he would be giving away too much. He had to wait until the other pieces were in place, and then he could make his move to capture the King and his Knight.

"What are you doing here?" Aberforth asked him and Tom cleared his head of his thoughts. "If you're here for Ariana - "

"Hardly," Tom interrupted. "And I am not here for you, either. At least, not in the way you are thinking. I would like your assistance."

"Why should I help you? I've seen you in the Prophet, standing close to Albus and Grindelwald."

Tom smirked at the shudder Aberforth gave at the names. "Precisely. They trust me. I am in a position to overthrow them. You can help me."

Aberforth glared at the younger man. "And if I refuse?"

"I know some people at Saint Mungo's who would love to meet Ariana." That got him. Tom smirked, again, as Aberforth paled at the suggestion.

"Suppose I agree. What then?"

"Then you await my instructions." Tom left without saying another word. He had a pawn in position. Now he just had to wait to make his next move.

(1) The Harry Potter Wiki says this spell is from the movies. I'm guessing it's the one Hermione uses to break Sirius out of the cell in PoA. I could be wrong, though. Anyway, the description it gave for it is what I need.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-28T14:34:00

2007-11-28T20:59:08Z

Thanks for all the nice comments. :) This one took me a couple of days since I was researching various things until I found something I was happy with. I also don't think this chapter is as long as the others. But I'll probably be posting in parts since, erm, I'm at work.

Chapter Three

The researchers didn't hear the tall man enter, involved as they were in their work. That, in itself, was a surprise, because the room was heavily fortified against threats. They continued reading their books, running their tests and checking how various potion ingredients came together. Occasionally, an explosion was heard and the researchers would all mutter to themselves that it was good or would wince in nervousness. There was a lot of smoke in the room when the man entered, but he managed to prevent himself from coughing.

"Gentlemen, Madam," the man added to the one woman in the room, and they all gazed at him in surprise. The tall man didn't lower the hood that concealed his face, and his voice sounded only vaguely familiar to a few of the assembled. "I understand Grindlewald has you working on his latest plans."

"That's confidential," one of the researchers said, but, as the rest of the eyes in the room turned towards him, he fell silent.

"True. I have another project I'd like you to attempt." He pulled out a tightly rolled piece of parchment and tossed it to the head researcher, a balding, bespectacled man whose graying hair still held hints of bright red. The man read the parchment, and he looked torn between awe and disgust.

"This is madness," he muttered.

"Indeed," the hooded man agreed. "But it may be what is needed to end the Rule."

The man stared at the parchment. "Or Grindlewald could use it to try and take over the resistant nations."

"Indeed. Are you willing to put your hope into that, though?" The man turned to leave. "I will return in a week. You use that time to decide if it is possible. If it is possible, you tell me what you need and I will arrange it."

"And if we fail?"

The man stopped long enough to look back, and even though his eyes were hidden, they felt a chill. "Do not fail. The consequences would be dire."

#

Lily pulled Cassandra towards the wand shop where Sirius already stood, looking impatient. As she did, Lily explained how most of the stores preferred to stay in Diagon Alley to prevent Muggles from buying their merchandise. A few did open branches in Muggle areas, however they kept their regular supplies hidden from the rest of the store, and no Muggle could get into the magic section.

"Even if Ollivander's could have moved, I doubt he would have," Lily added once they'd reached the store. Cassandra noted the year the store had opened, and she realized Lily was probably correct.

"All right, let's do this quickly," the Headmistress said. "Sirius, followed by Miss Evans, Mister Pettigrew, and - " she sneered - "Miss Porter. Sit down inside and keep quiet."

The three of them followed Sirius into the shop, and he headed for the counter confidentally. The shopkeeper, Mr. Ollivander Cassandra guessed, greeted the Headmistress quickly and then he returned to the back with a pile of wands. Cassandra watched, warily, and found it easy to stay quiet. It had the sort of atmosphere meant to keep things silent, whether it meant to do it or not. It took about five minutes for Sirius to find a suitable wand, which shot out red sparks that made his mother frown. Lily took a bit longer, but she soon joined Sirius, who had run outside and the pair of them were shooting sparks at each other. Peter found one relatively quickly, compared to the other two, and he ran outside to join the spark fight.

"Your turn, Miss Porter," the Headmistress said, sneering again. Cassandra was starting to hate that sneer everytime she said her name. She stood at the corner and cleared her throat when she heard a shout from outside. The bottom of Peter's robe was burning, and Sirius was laughing at the sight. A quick glance at the Headmistress made her realize that Madam Black was torn between disciplining her son and making sure Cassandra didn't blow up the shop. After a few moments, she went outside with the other children, and her shout to Sirius was exceptionally loud. Cassandra heard it as though Madam Black had never left.

Cassandra swallowed and looked up at the wide, pale eyes of Mister Ollivander. He stared at her for a few, long moments, but then he handed her a wand, she didn't hear what, and she held it for a few moments before he snatched it away again. (1)

This happened a few more times, but he didn't seem upset that he couldn't find one that worked. Cassandra was a bit frustrated, though, and she wondered if this whole situation had been a terrible mistake. A faint hope that they would see she actually wasn't a witch poked its head out from the back of her mind when he held out another wand.

"Rowan wood, ten inches, with a phoenix feather. Give it a try." (2)

She grasped the wand in her hand, and the world felt like it stopped for a moment. The wand seemed to fit perfectly in her hand, and she felt a strange connection, like the wand had been waiting for her, so that it could be a part of her arm. She barely noticed the sparks that flew out of the end of it as she was too awed by the feeling.

(1) UGH. Boring, cliche, wand finders. I should have just skipped the damned thing.
(2) Is that a Sue-ish wand? Or is the fact that I spent two days trying to compare astrological signs to the wood make it more Sue-ish?

I'll try to post more tonight. It's not a whole lot. Just the end of this scene and a brief return of Mr. Riddle. :)

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-25T23:39:00

2007-11-26T05:55:16Z

Chapter Two: Part Two

The car pulled up in front of the Leaky Cauldron, and a man and a woman came out. They glanced around the Muggles walking past in disdain before calmly casting spells near the entrance. The normal feelings of dismay and the terrible thoughts that inflicted their minds vanished for the time as the pair ordered a small group of children into the invisible building between the two empty stores.

After the children, another woman and man came out of the car behind the children, and, she, too, gave a look of contempt at the Muggles who had gathered to watch. Some of them believed that if they walked in the exact location the children had just entered, they would be able to follow and learn what the wizards were hiding from them, but it was impossible. No one had managed to do so.

Elisabeth Porter stood on the curb, blurry-eyed, as the two lines of children followed a black-haired woman with an intimidating face that marred her natural beauty. The witch and wizard who'd cast the spells took positions at both sides of the line while the second man, well-built with a glowering face, stood behind the line. His thick, dark wand pointed threateningly at the various Muggles who glanced their way. No one in their right minds would bother this group, the man, in general, looked like he would be well suited for a fight even without the frightening wand he held, but Elisabeth found she couldn't stay away.

"Keep moving, love," the heavy-set wizard said, and he raised his wand threateningly. She cowered a bit, but she stopped when a tiny girl with wide, dark eyes glanced in her direction and froze. Something in Elisabeth's mental fog woke up then.

"That's my Cassie," she cried at the wizard, as the younger witch was forcibly grabbed by the arm to rejoin the group.

"Get Miss Porter inside," the wizard said to the others with him.

"That's my Cassie," Elisabeth repeated, desperately. "You stole my Cassie." A few of the other Muggles on the street took the moment to glance in Elisabeth's direction, but, once they realized what was happening, they kept moving. No one wanted to be caught at the hands of a wizard, and, once she realized she was alone, Elisabeth started to cry. "They stole my Cassie."

She didn't know what came over her, but she took a step forward towards the wizard. She didn't know what she was going to do. She only knew that her hands were clenched into fists, and that was standing in front of the wizard, her eyes narrowed. She didn't even hear the spell cast. She just saw the light arch towards her and she fell backwards onto the ground.

"I'd just kill you myself," the wizard said as he looked down on her, and she tried to get enough strength to get to her feet. Unfortunately, she found she couldn't, that her legs were frozen together, and she couldn't stand. She glared up at him as he continued, "Unfortunately, being an irritating bint isn't a good enough reason. So I'm going to send you somewhere where you'll be out of the way. And I'll help you forget about 'Your Cassie'."

Elisabeth felt stunned at his words, and she stared up at him, unblinking, as he pointed his wand at her feet and muttered, "Obliviate."

#

Cassandra grabbed Lily's arm to steady herself as she felt a sinking feeling in the pit of her stomach. Lily glanced back, her green eyes wide with worry.

"What are they going to do to her?" Cassandra asked, softly and desperately, as the staff members started dividing the group.

"I don't know." Lily gripped Cassandra's hand reassuringly. "She'll be all right."

Cassandra nodded even though she heard the doubt in Lily's voice. "I hope so."

She started to grip the necklace(1) she wore, but, if she did, it would be discovered, and she would be disciplined for having a tie to the Muggle world. She shivered as she thought of the sharp quill of the Headmistress's and the lines she might be forced to write. She rubbed her hand when she caught Lily looking in her direction and she smiled awkwardly. Cassandra glanced at the Headmistress's husband as he came in the door, looking frustrated, and he shut the door behind them which dimmed the little light in the room even more and separated them further from the Muggle world.

"It's all right," Lily said, and she smiled brightly. "You're getting to see something no Muggle ever does!"

"I suppose you're right," Cassandra replied, and her smile grew a bit. She might have reservations about being a witch, but there was something exciting about getting a wand. And it was hard to be upset when Lily was that cheerful.

They finally had the ten children divided into groups, with Cassandra and Lily joined by Sirius and a round-faced boy that Cassandra knew only by face, but she was told that his name was Peter. He looked hungrily, and impatiently, towards the brick wall which was their final obstacle towards getting into Diagon Alley. Sirius was practically bouncing on the heels of his feet, and, since they'd been told that the reason they needed wands was in order to learn a few quick spells before heading to Hogwarts, she didn't need to know what he was excited about.

"Let's get on with it already," he muttered under his breath, and Cassandra raised her eyebrows. She didn't know if he had planned something to happen while they were in Diagon Alley, but, based on what she'd learned from Lily, she wouldn't be surprised.

Peter glanced in Sirius's direction before he turned his attention to the two girls. "Did you see that Muggle?" he asked, and Cassandra paled from the tone of disgust in his voice. She wanted to speak up, but, instead, she just shook her head. She didn't have time to think of a suitable scathing reply before they started shuffling them into Diagon Alley.

"The four of you are together?" The Headmistress said, and she narrowed her eyes. "I'm going to have to go with you." As Cassandra stepped through the brick wall into Diagon Alley, she heard the Headmistress add, "If I don't, the place will be rubble in an hour."

"Why doesn't she trust us?" Cassandra whispered to Lily.

"It's not us she doesn't trust," Lily replied. "It's Sirius."

"Speak for yourself, Lily." Cassandra dared a glance in Headmistress Black's direction. "I'm fairly certain she doesn't trust me."

"That may be so, but you haven't learned to toe the line yet." Lily smiled again. "Let's go. Sirius is already headed for Ollivander's."

(1)I'm including a note here, because I just want to clear something up. There's nothing magical or special about the necklace. It's just important to Cassandra.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-25T02:03:00

2007-11-25T08:25:26Z

A/N: I'm thinking of calling this The Greater Good for the irony.

Chapter Two: Part One

Over the next, several weeks, Cassandra was thrown into lessons in order to "catch her up" with the rest of her classmates. By being that busy, she was able to focus less on her homesickness and more on what was in front of her. It was her rare comfort technique, throwing herself in studies rather than paying attention to what was around her. Still, it had taken some convincing, but she'd finally managed to get the instructors to see that she did know how to read, write and perform arithmetic. They gave her history lessons, but she found it biased as they spent a great deal of time telling her what the Muggles had done to ruin their own country before Grindelwald and Dumbledore liberated them. They gave her some foundation in magical herbology, which she found interesting even if she had to spend the hours degnoming Madam Black's garden, and magical creatures, which she didn't. So, while the rest of the children spent the warm, summer days playing pick-up games of Quidditch in the yard, Cassandra was left to read thick books with words she had trouble pronouncing. She didn't mind, however, since she knew most wouldn't invite her to play.

There was one other "lesson" which she was required to attend, and, despite the inocuous title of "Muggle Studies", she spent hours listening to how wizards were superior to Muggles and the Muggles deserved the scorn of the Wizarding Community. Cassandra always left the lessons feeling very depressed, and she would then take the time to sit in the gloomy living room and stare out the window. Sometimes, she ran up to her room, removed Harry from Lily's cabinet, and cried into his plush fur.

Lily and Sirius became her only friends as the rest of the school tended to avoid her. Cassandra wanted to tell how she felt to them, but every time she tried she found she couldn't explain how she felt, or why she spent the night sobbing when Petunia became especially nasty to her. Lily seemed sympathetic, but she'd occasionally repeated Petunia's mantra of "They're just muggles", and Sirius was a pureblood, and, therefore, didn't really understand what her complaints were about. She became especially irritated with him when he showed her the pair of dots which indicated himself and his brother on the tapestry which stretched past centuries.

"Don't you ever worry that it will end?" she asked, once she'd gotten over her initial anger with him and disbelief at the tapestry.

"Just those still on the tapestry are pure," he replied, and he narrowed his eyes at it. "My great-uncle Marius was a Squib... Of course, Grindelwald can't let that happen."

Cassandra paled. "What happened to him?"

"Some families try to hide their squibs away. Send them to the States and such, but I can't picture my great-grandfather doing that." Sirius sighed, and her anger with him lessened somewhat. "He was probably sent to one of Grindelwald's camps or he was killed. It happens sometimes."

Lily tapped Cassandra on the shoulder and startled her. "You two look upset. Aren't you excited about the trip to Diagon Alley tomorrow?"

"I don't know if I'm going," Cassandra replied, thoughtfully. "They'd probably want to keep me here for lessons and such."

"But what about a wand?"

"I don't know when I'm getting one of those, honestly." Cassandra lowered her head. "Maybe I'll have to order one."

"You need to get one yourself. Petunia told me all about it."

Sirius frowned. "You can just ask for permission," he said.

"I could, I suppose..."

"Oh, please ask, Cassandra," Lily said, and she smiled in excitement. "It'd be brilliant to go and get our things together."

"All right, I'll ask, but I don't think they'll let me." Cassandra looked sheepishly at Sirius. "Your mother doesn't seem to like me much."

Sirius snorted. "She doesn't seem to like me much. But if that's the case, I'll beg off too. I can go some other time."

Cassandra glanced at a nearby clock, and she paled. "Oh, no. I forgot. I have a lesson."

She ran towards the doorway, and she swallowed, nervously. Showing up late probably wouldn't make anyone more willing to give her privileges, she realized as she stepped out into the small, makeshift classroom. She sat down at one of the tables that were set up, and she started flipping through the pages when Mr. Lupin, one of the instructors came in.

"Mr. Lupin?" she asked, tentatively, and she raised her hand slowly. "I- I was wondering if I might be allowed to go to Diagon Alley. For the day. Tomorrow."

He looked thoughtful for a moment. "I see no problem with it, but it would be up to the Headmistress to decide." He pulled out a piece of parchment from inside of the book he carried. "I made up a short exam for you. I'll ask for you while you take it. All right?" She nodded. "I might rescind, though, if you do poorly."

Cassandra gulped with nervousness until she realized he was smiling. "I'm sure you'll do fine," he added as he placed the paper in front of her.

She read the first few questions, and she managed to return his smile a bit. She was also certain she'd do well.

A/N (2): I'm too tired to post anymore tonight, so it's just a quickie. I need to finish the next couple of scenes to my satisfaction anyway. Although, I'm never truly satisfied so we'll see.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-24T00:34:00

2007-11-24T06:59:36Z

Okay, let's jump right into it, shall we?

The entire house looked at the small, brown haired girl with a tear-stained face, and most couldn't keep the hostility out of their eyes. She'd been raised by Muggles, tained by their ways and their squalor. Even the staff members couldn't keep their disgust out of their eyes. As the Headmistress thrust a pile of envelopes to her, she carefully avoided any contact with Cassandra, lest some of her inate Muggleness spread to her. The Headmistress made a mental note to ensure that Miss Porter received a good scrubbing before she sent her to bed. There was no telling what kind of contaminates she carried.

"Miss Porter, please bring these to your table," Headmistress Black said, and she gestured to a table with an empty seat. The other children at the table looked at her in shock and disgust. Cassandra glanced down at the at the pile of envelopes, her name was printed in green lettering on the top of the pile, and she walked towards the other children at the indicated table, who didn't look welcoming at all.

"Miss Porter," the Headmistress added as Cassandra reached the table. "Please do not slouch. You are a witch now. Take pride in it and stand up straight."

Cassandra tried, but as soon as the Headmistress's back was turned, she placed the envelopes on the table and lay her arms. She heard the movement of other children, along with the Headmistress occasionally calling out names of students to bring piles of envelopes to their tables. A black haired boy at her table tapped her on the arm, apparently ignoring everyone else's resistance to the idea of actually touching her, and he showed her the envelope with her name on it. She grabbed it before burying her head in her arms again.

"Miss Porter." A stunned hush fell over the table as the Headmistress came up behind her. She grasped Cassandra from behind and forced her to her feet. The Headmistress then grabbed Cassandra's hair and pulled it back so she was looking straight ahead. She winced as the Headmistress pulled her shoulders so her back was rigid (1) then sat Cassandra back down.

"Do not let me see you like that again, Miss Porter, or I shall have to punish you severely. Miss Evans - " A blonde girl, who had been quietly giggling with her red-haired neighbor, looked up in surprise. (2) "Miss Porter will be staying in your room. After dinner, please escort her there." Evans looked as though she were going to protest, but she nodded once before giving Cassandra an evil look. The red-haired girl beside her looked a bit sympathetic, although, as the Headmistress walked away, they both went back to their giggling and whispering.

"Shall we dine?" The Headmistress asked, and, as soon as she did, the plates in front of them were filled with food. Cassandra glanced down at her meal of stew, but she knew she wouldn't be able to eat if she tried. She stuck her fork into it, and she pushed it around the dish, but none made it to her lips. She didn't even want to try.

After a moment, she realized the black-haired boy sharing their table wasn't eating, either, but, rather, he was watching the table where the staff members were sitting carefully. When he caught her eye, he held up one finger in front of his mouth, and he gestured towards the table. Cassandra raised her eyebrows, but she didn't say anything. The red-haired girl seemed to notice something was going on, and she looked at the pair of them.

"Oh, no, Sirius," she whispered once she realized that the boy was doing something. "You're going to be in so much trouble." He made another shushing motion and returned to his focus of the main table.

It didn't take long for something to happen. As soon as the Headmistress picked up her fork, a strange silence seemed to overcome the room, or perhaps that was just the stress of waiting for something interesting to happen. There was a small explosion, and the room was filled with a large amount of foul smelling material. Cassandra covered her nose and gagged as the Headmistress looked over the room with murder in her eyes as she wiped the dark stuff from her face. She looked in the direction of Sirius, who had started laughing hysterically at the Headmistress. (3)

"Sirius," the blonde girl said, her voice halfway between whining and demanding. "Why did you do that? You won't be fed for a week!"

Sirius sobered. "Mum wouldn't kill me. She'd have to leave everything to Reg, and then where would she be?" He gave a dismissive glance towards one of the younger students. There was something doubtful in his voice, though, and he shrunk a bit as the Headmistress approached.

"You three. Bed. Now."

Cassandra didn't need to be told twice. She leapt to her feet, and she noticed the others do the same. The blonde girl seemed to have forgotten she was supposed to show Cassandra to their room, as she ran out of the room like it was on fire. The red haired girl looked exasperated.

"Tuney, will you wait for us?" She looked at Cassandra, curiously. "Well, c'mon, then."

They dashed up two flights of stairs to a dark room. Cassandra paused at the entrance of the room. "Tuney" was already on one of the beds, her head bent over a heavy book. The red haired girl walked to a closet between the beds, and she pulled out two sets of nightgowns.

"Here," she said, and she handed one to Cassandra. "They don't seem to have given you any of your things."

"They've probably going to burn them," Tuney added, and Cassandra swallowed, hard, and she gripped the nightgown in a tight fist in her hand.

"That's a horrible thing to say," the red-haired girl said, angrily. "They wouldn't do that."

"Wouldn't they?"

Cassandra saw the doubt crawl over the other girl's face, but Cassandra didn't feel any doubt at all. They definitely would burn her things. She was lucky they hadn't forced her to give up the clothes she'd been wearing, although she'd probably have to give them up soon. She thought, idly, of the simple, gold necklace she wore. If anything, she didn't want to give it up. It was the last thing she had to remember her father by, but she doubted that her simple "Muggle" sentiments would be much good against her adult adversaries.

She sat down on the edge of the third bed in the room, it looked like someone had just shoved it into the free space in the bedroom, and she took a good look around. The girls didn't have anything that gave any real indication to their personalities. There were no dolls or plushies, there were no posters. There was just one closet and two beds, plus her bed which just screamed that it was there because there was nowhere else to put it.

She lay down on the bed, and she stared up at the ceiling as the other girls bustled about getting ready to sleep. "Tuney" constantly made complaints about not being able to sleep since she barely got anything to eat, and it was that awful boy's fault, and she didn't know why Lily, the red-haired girl, bothered being friendly with him. Lily constantly tried to give explanations, but it didn't work at all, and, eventually, she just stopped trying and let Tuney rant.

Once Tuney had fallen silent, Lily came over to Cassandra's bed, and she held out a plushie to her. Cassandra sat back up, and she raised her eyebrows in surprise. "Here," Lily said. "I think you need Harry (4) more than I do."

"Harry?" Cassandra asked, blinking.

"I've had him since I was little," Lily explained. "And he helps keep me company sometimes, but I still have some things. You don't. So here."

Cassandra took it, and she managed to give a wry smile. "Thank you," she said as she held the half-horse, half-eagle close to her.

Lily sat down at the edge of the bed, and Cassandra felt comfortable enough to sit up next to her. "Aren't you the least bit excited about going to Hogwarts?" Lily asked, and Cassandra knew she was thinking of the unopened envelope left on the table.

"I'd rather be home," she replied, softly. She knew that her mother had climbed into a bottle by then, and, without Cassandra there to stop her, had probably passed out on the floor of the living room. The thought gave Cassandra a sinking feeling in her stomach. Guiltily, she wondered how often she'd dreamed of being taken away from their tiny flat, but in those daydreams she'd always been loved, not scorned.

"You are home, aren't you? Don't you belong here?"

"I don't know." Cassandra squeezed Harry closer to her. "I think I'm going to miss my mum."

"She's just a Muggle," Tuney said, derisively from her bed, and Cassandra jumped, startled. She choked back a sob and buried her face in Harry's side. As Cassandra lay herself back onto the bed, Lily stood quickly and nearly ran back to her own bed. Once the room was completely dark, Cassandra pulled the blankets over her head and let herself cry. (5)

(1) This is another sentence that I can't make work right.
(2) Yes, it's Petunia Evans as a witch. I wanted to see how well I could make it work and be believable.
(3) I'm not real crazy about the prank, actually. I'm not sure why I threw it in. Actually, this whole segment went completely different, and longer, in my original version.
(4) Yes, I know that was corny.
(5) I'm kind of worried Cassandra's a bit Sue-ish, actually.

It's another long section, but at least Chapter One is finished.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-23T22:00:00

2007-11-24T04:56:51Z

I've got a lot of thoughts about this. Mostly, other than being long and complicated (which given how often I use to describe the fanfic, it might as well be the title), I'm going to bring up several points at the bottom about your opinion on things as I go along.

This is a very raw version. I haven't edited most of my late night ramblings as of yet.

Oh, and because I'm weird, I've included footnotes. :)

A/N: As should be expected, very little is mine. It's J.K. Rowling's. I'm just borrowing it and twisting it (as it probably shouldn't be twisted).

Untitled
Chapter One: Part One

What if, in 1898, Ariana Dumbledore, had lived?
What if, rather than fleeing from Godric's Hollow, Gellert Grindelwald had stayed?
What if Albus Dumbledore and Gellert Grindelwald had managed to brought their plans to fruition, lifted the Statute of Secrecy, overthrown the world together as one for "The Greater Good"?
What if they had succeeded with their wildest, teenaged dreams? What then?(1)

In mid-summer, 1971, a buzz filled the dining hall of the Grimmauld Place Orphanage (2). A group of children, Muggleborns for the most part, sat in nervous anticipation of the letters they were to receive. The older students, secure as they were in their position, smiled inanely at the younger ones, although they eagerly awaited their booklists. The youngest of the group looked with envy upon the older ones as they would have another year, or more, under the supervision of their strict Headmistress.

Walburga Black entered the hall and quiet fell as though she'd cast a silencing charm on the entire room. She sneered at the rows of children anxiously awaiting news of their acceptance. Her own two sons sat among the group, and she frowned as Sirius's eyes glinted mischievouslyin the dimly lit room. If the boy tried to do something wrong, she would have to discipline him, and it took too much time.

She opened her mouth to speak, and, from the upstairs, she heard the screeching cry which meant the youngest resident had awakened. Headmistress Black started to request that one of the junior staff members take care of it, but Rhea Kingston (3) was already on her feet. Headmistress Black nodded her approval. She liked to see things well taken care of. (4)

"Students, as I'm sure you are aware, your Hogwarts letters have arrived." In another setting, the Headmistress's speech might have been interrupted by a loud cheer, but, instead, the children watched her with wide, wary eyes. "Unfortunately," she continued. "when the school list was originally created for the First Years, they apparently missed one. As you may have noted, one of your instructors has been missing most of the day. He had gone to fetch our newest resident."

She moved, slightly, and a pale faced, brown-haired girl appeared behind her. "This is Cassandra Porter (5)," Headmistress Black finished, coldly. "Do try and make her feel welcome."

#(6)

(7)Albus watched the younger wizard read off his report, and he thought he saw a faint hint of malevolence in Tom Riddle's face. He sighed to himself as he cast a glance in Gellert's direction. The other man leaned back in his chair,his feet up on the desk, and, as he stared up at the ceiling, it was hard to tell he listened at all.

"And the camps?" Gellert asked as Riddle finished his spiel.

"The two new ones will be finished by the end of the week."

The camps... Albus should have noticed sooner, but it was far too late. He'd been blinded by the young Gellert, he supposed, and caused misery to many people. But part of him kept telling him that it was too late. The first camp had simply been for violent criminals. Fair enough. The second... well, they had to put nonviolent criminals somewhere, right? And then there was the third camp, the one vocal dissidents, and the parents of Muggleborns who didn't want their children taken away. It kept the way clear for their plans. And then the werewolves and the vampires, who had to be locked away to keep people safe. Of course, that had had unforseen consequences, as the werewolves and the vampires took their captivity in a sort of stride, and after every full moon they had to send wizards out there to clean up the bodies. That had been a messy affair.

The Muggleborn children taken from their homes, raised to despise where they came from. It didn't feel right or fair, which is a complaint he'd long heard when the policy had started. Gellert had kept telling him it helped protect the wizards, that it was for "the Greater Good", and sometimes Albus hated himself for having those thoughts that many years ago. It was hard to deny that some good had come from everything. The world was relatively peaceful, except for easily quelled scirmishes, and most seemed relatively happy. Except for the Muggles, of course, but they were insignifigant to the big picture.

As Riddle left the room, Albus felt there was something striking about the man. It wasn't the charm he exuded or his handsome face, although he had both in abundance. It was the way he often seemed disappointed that he was nothing more than Gellert's Undersecretary, and he often looked as though he wanted more. He seemed to want more to be done.

"Is everything all right?"

Gellert's voice woke him from his thoughts, and he looked at the other man, his longterm companion. If Albus was the type to curse, he would have. "Do you trust Tom Riddle?" he asked, softly.

Gellert smiled, the hint of the wild boy he once had been still evident in his eyes. "Riddle does very good work for very little pay."

"There is that," Albus agreed, lightly. "But something about him worries me."

"Why is that?"

Albus couldn't reply, though. He found it difficult to articulate that he was worried that he was being replaced. And he could just imagine the fires that Tom Riddle could be responsible.

(1)I'm not crazy about this section. This is just the scenario, but this is already too long and complicated without trying to exactly go into details about how it all came about. The thing that causes me fear is that I'm sure I'm going to need to bring it about at sometime.
(2) I need a better word here, since it's definitely not an orphanage. With very few exceptions, the children aren't orphans. BTW, I set it at Grimmauld Place for two reasons. 1) Convenience and 2) it made sense to me, at least with the Blacks in a way.
(3) For those who read and remember, Rhea (Kingston) Lupin was the main character of Phase of Courage. I'm attempting something else here, but I have too many subplots running in my head.
(4) Sentence feels awkward to me.
(5) zylly has seen the name before, at least. I'm very bad with coming up with new names.
(6) It's just an icon for a scene change. No biggie.
(7) This originally was part of Chapter 2, but I moved it here, mostly because anyone reading would want some sort of idea what's going on beyond Grimmauld Place. I have run into a brick wall as far as Ariana is concerned, so any ideas anyone has are welcome. (I'm considering having Aberforth run after her at some point, once everything gets started, but I'm not sure.) Not to mention, I'm not sure how in character Albus is here.</font>

This is getting long. I'll see you all in the next part soon. :)

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-22T16:45:00

2007-11-22T21:54:17Z

So, to show how old I am, my high school class was supposed to have its ten-year reunion this year. I was dead set against going. No, seriously, I didn't want to see those people again. At least until I'm a multi-millionaire and can rub it in their faces (hey, I can dream, can't I?).

I got a letter from my high school that I didn't open until today when my niece showed it to me. I opened it up and I start laughing. Apparently, no one else had any interest in going, either. The reunion had to be cancelled "due to lack of responses". I don't know why I find this so funny, but it's cracking me up.

Of course, they threw in a guilt trip:
"The committee members worked very hard on putting this together... We unfortunately will not be reimbursed for our time and money as we used as both deposits..." I don't care. I hated the rumors and things spread about me during the four years of high school. And if no one else wants to pretend to have liked each other for a few hours, then it's going to make me laugh. Maniacally.

Although it sounds like they paid for things with time.

Maybe in ten years I'll want to talk to these people again. Yeah. Right.

ellipsis_addict @ 2007-11-22T10:58:00

2007-11-22T16:12:04Z

*dusts off journal*

Wow, that actually worked. I probably should have waited a couple of weeks. Then I could have left it unupdated for a full year and then snuck up on everyone. Haha!

There's a livejournal user called ellipsisaddict (one word) who happens to post at a couple of the communities that I read. It's very confusing to see at times. I find myself thinking "I don't remember posting that." Then I remember that I didn't, and it's just a similar user name.

I noticed that someone on metaquotes was saying that they sent a thank-you note back to Neil Gaiman for the e-mail he sent to all Nano users. It occurs to me that I could have done the same. Although, mine would have come out something like: "Thank you for the e-mail. Of course, I'm an idiot and I didn't send a copy of my novel to my e-mail so when the dog broke the monitor of the computer I had it on, I couldn't get at it anymore (as I'm now using a laptop at home). But thank you anyway! I loved Good Omens!"

Speaking of writing, erm, sort of. I've been working on an AU HP fic. It's, as I told zylly, going to be long and complicated. I've finished the first chapter, though, and I'm considering posting it. Any potential readers? BTW, don't ask me what it's about. It's too long and complicated to explain. And I'll chew your ear off about it.

So, it's Thanksgiving, huh? I'm thankful I've finally got a job, but I don't have to work today. (I do, however, have to work tomorrow, which seems to surprise everyone I tell that to.) I'm thankful I've gotten over my months long series of writer's block, but I think forcing myself to write at the beginning of Nano helped.

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-12-18T00:38:00

2006-12-18T05:38:30Z

More from fandom_wank since Potter fans can't stop wanking.

*sighs* I like Harry Potter. I like Pratchett.

I try not to wank about either of them. At least, based on fandom_wank, Pratchett fans are relatively sane.

And Potter fans have got to learn that the world doesn't revolve around them.

Oh, and congrats, zylly for getting on metaquotes.

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-11-08T15:19:00

2006-11-08T20:18:51Z

Paralegal classes are killing my brain. I see a title like Draco & Hermione Vs The World and I start wondering who would have jurisdiction over the trial.

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-11-03T11:34:00

2006-11-03T16:34:41Z

You know what's sad? I wanted to dress up for Halloween. I had no plans or anything, but I just wanted to dress up. *pouts*

Maybe next year I'll steal my mother's cane and go as House. But no one would probably get it...

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-10-05T16:01:00

2006-10-05T20:03:43Z

binky_betsy

I have no comment. Not that I'm affected since I don't have any of those particular icons.

ETA: It occurs to me that Nano's starting less than a month from now. With the amount of work I'm getting at school, I'm wondering if I would have time to do it...

Not that I have any ideas...

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-10-03T07:37:00

2006-10-03T11:38:56Z

...

You know there's something wrong in the world when one of the Amish does a school shooting.

I'm just saying...

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-09-25T15:51:00

2006-09-25T19:52:43Z

My sister's moving back to my house...

I think she's planning on taking over my room.

I like my room. It's big.

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-09-24T03:32:00

2006-09-24T07:37:31Z

Why the hell am I still awake? I've been wanting to go to sleep for a couple hours now. *sighs* Just standard stupidity on my part...

Anyway, it's weird. I've been... busy, really. More to the point that I have class for six hours a day, four days a week. Not to mention homework. When I was talking to the admission's director, she said there was probably about an hour of homework a night. I don't think I've had less than two since I started. And several times, Futurama will come on, and I'll go "OMG, it's 10:30?!"

Yeah, my life is still exciting, isn't it? It's keeping me a bit busy... as well as frustrated. When my sister, under similar circumstances, went to school all day, I had to watch her kids. I, on the other hand, have to watch her kids while trying to do my homework. And getting them to do theirs. And getting them to go to bed.

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-09-01T01:19:00

2006-09-01T05:20:54Z

I'm starting paralegal classes in a few days (September 5th).

What the hell was I thinking?

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-08-21T21:57:00

2006-08-22T02:09:24Z

In yesterday's Parade Magazine, Marilyn Vos Savant suggested that her readers send her a list of words that should be shortened because they are too difficult to spell. She was responding to a question where one suggested that "tho", "thru" and "altho" be standard spellings, as "though", "through" and "although" are too difficult as it is.

So I'm thinking, that's a good idea. In fact, why don't we take it one step further. Perhaps "a lot" should become one word. Perhaps I should stop twinging with agony everytime someone writes "alright" instead of "all right". ("Alright" might be considered "acceptable", but it still pains me to see.) Since everyone spells "grammar" with an "-er" at the end, let's just change the spelling to that.

My response:

DEAR MARILYN U R ABSOLUT3LEY CORECT!11!! WE SHUD ABREVIAET TEH ENGLISH LANGUAEG IN ORD3R 2 MAEK THNGS 3ASEIR 2 SPAL AND WRIET!!11!1! MILIONS OF INT3RNAT UESRS DO SO ALRAADY!!111 OMG IN FACT P3RHAPS W3 SHUD ALOW CHAT SPAAK 2 REPLAEC 3NGLISH AS A WHOLE!11111 OMG LOL JUST IMAGIEN HOW EASY IT WUD B 2 COMUNICAET THES WAY

SINCAR3LEY!!!!11 OMG WTF U
3LIPSIS_ADICT

Seriously, is English so difficult for native speakers to learn how to spell correctly?

ellipsis_addict @ 2006-08-20T04:01:00

2006-08-20T08:07:24Z

All right, I know I said I was going to talk about stuff from L.G., but since I never got around to it, I'm just not going to bother.

On another note, Psych is nonexistant on ff.net. Either that, or I just didn't look hard enough, which wouldn't surprise me. But I don't want to find any, really. I don't want to see what fangirls have done to Shawn and Gus.

I have just realized the possibility of someone writing a Mary Sue fic with their character getting rid of Gus in a stupid way while their real psychic partners up with Shawn. Please tell me that doesn't exist. Please.

And, on a completely unrelated note... It seems to me that the comics in the Neopian times used to be, well, funnier. Now I'm lucky if I crack a smile at one or two.